Opinions and consequences

So I have been humbled, and it took no more than a simple letter from a father to his children, I have been struggling to try to be a help to my family and to be a common ground for the rift that has occurred in it. I am failing, try as I might words fail me. I feel so tired of the constant blame of others that has been happening on a nigh constant basis. The petty power struggles to be sure that we as individuals are right, and others must see us as right as well.

Something has to change, and I know that it is not in my power to change other people, it has to be me that I change, my habits both in communication and application have to become more pure. I must be more full of a Christ-like love. I need to act upon the idea that every action I do is either doing one of two things, loving my neighbor or not loving my neighbor.

I need to realize that the words I say need to be spoken with absolute love, with compassion for another soul. I have to work on allowing others to disagree with me, and not feeling like I have to convince them to my way of thinking. I see the world differently than anyone else can possibly see it, I see it as I experience it. No one else can see it my way, for only I have walked the path that I have tread in this life.

I am responsible for my actions and I will pay the natural consequences of them, it doesnt make the consequence any less to say it was someone elses fault, that I acted because of something that was done or said to me by another. Only I can choose for me, and ultimately I must be held accountable for the results of those choices.

Those that know me know me to be a concerned person for the needs and desires of others, if there is a need I can fill I try to have an attitude that I will do what I can to fix it. But I am realizing something, God is the only one that can "fix" things, I am merely a tool in his hands at times. Sometimes I feel like a cheap wal-mart tool, the kind that will break the first time it encounters a little resistance.

So I move forward this day and all the others to come with a faith that I will be able to be more loving in my actions and in my speech, and that while I cant always be in agreement with my neighbor, I can still love them.

More and more

Trust, such a key part of life, it is a bond that unites people towards a common goal. How can we love those who we do not trust?

I find that the more I can trust a persons intent vs. a persons actions, the more free I am to love that person. For while actions can affect me in direct ways, to judge a persons intent and not believe that they want things that are good would be affecting me in indirect ways as well. My attitude towards that person would not be one where forgiveness could be given, "because they meant to cause me harm" It amazes me how often a little thoughtless act can turn into a war between souls, that we become so selfish in our own attitudes that another cannont recieve that which we believe is undeserved.

Its a complex mess, a downward spiral, by showing distrust of intent tells the other person that you do not care for them as individuals, so they begin to distrust YOUR intent, and downward and downward it goes.
We cannot begin to fix the problem until one person shows enough integrity to trust intent, over the actions resulted from that intent. New actions can be learned, a different approach to problems can be developed, but we cannot teach intent, its something that comes from God, to have a Godly intent, does not mean we have Godly actions.